I lost four pounds since Wednesday

I lost four pounds!

It doesn’t seem like much. I am very overweight and have a lot to lose, but look here. I lost four pounds. I started Weight Watchers online on Wednesday and I have been following it until today. I am starting again. Whenever I start a weight loss plan I get really excited about it and tell people about it. I started with my family who knows just to be encouraging. In the back of their mind, I know they must be skeptical. They have seen me try and fail and try and fail. They are amazing though. My family gets behind me anyway. They say all the good stuff. They will encourage me and watch while I try to only take one serving. They will also ask me how I am doing. Even sometimes they will hesitantly try and give me some advice. I am not easy to approach with advice unless I ask for it.
Then I tell my coworkers, who are more forthcoming with advice. My friend Tom has lost fifty pounds, he says that the key for him has been adding fruits and vegetables. When he added those vegetables he said that it sort of pushed out all the bad stuff in his diet. He also says focusing on adding things is much more pleasant than thinking about what you can’t have. This makes sense to me.
This is the most wonderful advice I have been given. Sometimes people tell me about their weight loss surgery, the drops they take, the juice fasts, and all the other many other things try. There is camaraderie in losing weight. Not only do most people need to or have lost weight, but they also want to help. Most people recognize the inherent loneliness in trying to lose weight. Most goals are prosperous. You start at a baseline and go up from there. Losing weight is like digging yourself out of a hole. You are starting below the line at a deficit. It isn’t like trying to get a degree, or bag a new job. Those things are something you feel no shame talking about. When you are doing those things you are able to boast proudly, “Look at what I am doing! Bettering myself!!”
Of course I should feel the same way about losing weight, but I don’t. I don’t always want to talk about how I have slowly dug myself into this hole. It makes me feel ashamed that I have repeatedly made the wrong choices. I cower at most conversations about weight, especially if I am not losing at the moment.
When I am losing however, I want to shout it to the world. I think, that even when I am not maybe I should be more open about it. I mean if you think about it. I wear my scarlet F on my chest. No one is going to accuse me of being skinny. If I talked about it more to people who clearly care for me, maybe then I would shame myself into doing the right thing more often.
In this issue, I am so clouded with my shame that I rarely think to put myself in other’s shoes. When I see someone overweight, trying to lose weight. I am excited for them, and a little jealous. It doesn’t matter how they try, unless it is super unhealthy. I am always happy for them. I have learned to at least do that. I think that if we as a nation are going to get through this obesity epidemic, we will all need to be supportive.

2 thoughts on “I lost four pounds since Wednesday

  1. Yeah, I don’t know why weight loss plans are fun until supper time. So my photo makes me ashamed and I don’t put it online. But I’m also ashamed of not being able to keep a diet for more than 4 hours. Bad! Bad! Bad! I shake a finger at myself. But I like what you said above, “I’m starting again.” There’s gotta be something there, practice, practice, practice! As in, work at it so I’ll be a little better at controlling my food intake as I go along.

  2. Camaraderie in weight loss is great. A friend at church is losing fast. I’m losing slow, Another guy in the group is moaning, “I’ve got to get started with this. You guys are leaving me behind.” So the mutual interest we have in losing weight is very encouraging.

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