My Mornings

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I have been having a hard time in the morning. I am foggy, nauseous, and mostly just in a bad mood.  I have read a lot about other diabetics having problems waking up as well. I get nausea as soon as I am conscious.  I have tried eating something right away and that helps.

The true problem is that I am just not a morning person. That fact has been what I scheduled my life around since I left my parents home. I have maneuvered my way onto the second shift at every job I have worked. Seven am has always been an abhorrent idea to me. That is until my husband got this job here in Philadelphia.  He has to be there at eight thirty which means we have to get up at seven. Ugh!

Well, Ugh has been my disposition for about a month. That’s how long we have been here, waking up begrudgingly every day.  Like a spoiled teenager, I hit the snooze button over and over until my husband coaxes me out of bed. Then I slowly grope my way over to the kitchen to silently make breakfast. It isn’t until husband and I sit down to eat that my normally sunny personality even cracks through the smog of my bad attitude and the deadening of my brain.

It’s not a pleasant way to wake up for me or the ever patient husband I live with. I have for many days not even gotten out of bed until after he left. Some days I have actually gotten my husband to buy me breakfast and bring it back.

To give you some idea of how unfair that is I have to tell you Brad has been cooking breakfast for me for the past four or five years.  He just got this really good job and the deal was it was my turn to make meals while he supports me.

So I have been feeling really guilty, and I didn’t really know how to pick myself up out of this fog. I desperately wished to be a morning person. You know the one that gets up at seven with a cheer in their heart and a spring in their step.

I did some research on how to become a morning person.

I don’t often believe in self talk.  It always sounds so self help-y. Tell yourself mornings are good, they say. Put your alarm far away, they say. Now that just makes me even more ticked off that I have to fall off the bed and grunt across the room to turn it off, and it doesn’t deter me from getting back into bed.

I found a list of anti nausea food and am putting some crackers and nuts by my bed to eat early in the morning.  But the biggest thing that helped me was telling myself the night before that the next day was going to be awesome.  I planned out the breakfast I was going to cook and told myself I was going to impress my husband.  I got myself really excited at the idea of making a good breakfast and getting my husband to smile.

The next morning I only snoozed twice and then I hopped out of bed and made smoothies, poached eggs and turkey sausage. I actually coaxed my husband out of bed this morning.  I even sang. Can I tell myself I am a morning person and then become one by sheer force of will? I don’t know. I felt better.

I felt like I had single handedly conquered mornings.  Of course I haven’t.  Tonight I asked my husband to describe me this morning and he said, “Forcefully cheerful.” In other words he could tell I was really trying.  I hadn’t just conquered mornings but I think I got a little closer to enjoying them.

This development has made me realize that most of the time when I have a problem it may not be an outside force. It may just be the song in my heart and I just need to change the tune.  I am thirty nine years old and I am still adjustable.  I still need to tweak the playlist sometimes.

One thought on “My Mornings

  1. Judy Pearson

    Good job. I know since I have retired that I sleep in usually until 8 and I know if I just make the adjustment to 7, I will have extra time. I need to get to bed before midnight.
    Keep up the good work.

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